Cowboy's Guide to Life
* Your fences need to be horse high, pig tight and bull strong.
* Life ain't about how fast you run, or how high you climb, but how well you bounce.
* Keep skunks and bankers and lawyers at a distance.
* Life is simpler when you plow around the stump.
* A bumble bee is considerably faster than a John Deere tractor.
* Words that soak into your ears are whispered...not yelled.
* Meanness don't jest happen overnight.
* Forgive your enemies. It messes up their heads.
* Do not corner something that you know is meaner than you.
* It don't take a very big person to carry a grudge.
* You cannot unsay a cruel word.
* Every path has a few puddles.
* When you wallow with pigs, expect to get dirty.
* The best sermons are lived, not preached.
* Most of the stuff people worry about ain't never gonna happen anyway
* Don't judge folks by their relatives.
* Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.
* Live a good, honorable life. Then when you get older and think back, you'll enjoy it a second time.
* Don't interfere with somethin' that ain't botherin' you none.
* Timing has a lot to do with the outcome of a rain dance.
* The easiest way to eat crow is while it's still warm, 'cause the colder it gets, the harder it is to swaller.
* If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop diggin'.
* It don't take a genius to spot a goat in a flock of sheep.
* Sometimes you get, and sometimes you get got.
* The biggest troublemaker you'll probably ever have to deal with watches you shave his face in the mirror every mornin'.
* If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around.
* Always drink upstream from the herd.
* Good judgment comes from experience, and a lotta that comes from bad judgment.
* Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier than puttin' it in.
* Don't squat with you'r spurs on.
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