Tap Tap Tap Is this thing on????
Can someone give me a boost up on to the soapbox, please?
Hello, Please forgive me for my short fuse and improper language.
I'm going to stand on this soapbox and share my POV. I've got a lot to say and I hope that it can be digested.
I am frustrated by the stuff going around here. I try to avoid anything political because it tends to bring out anger, hatred, and trolls. But I can't say silent and I need to say something.
For those not aware of why I'm stating this it's in reference to ICE. And my remarks about military and prisons are in regards to separation of parents from children. That's simply so the context will make a bit more sense below.
The people who I was forced to call my parents would often and frequently put me in dog cage instead of trying to find a babysitter to watch me. At least until I got too big to fit. Because of that, I find the reports that children are being put into such a thing extremely distasteful and highly triggering. There was no one in authority to protect me. There weren’t any adults with the balls to speak up and out. So whether it’s true or not it bothers me, it makes me angry, it makes me sad, and it makes me not want to live in a world that treats children how my parents treated me.
Because of that treatment, I have been dictated to on what I can and can’t do for my children. Even having it recommended that I be medically neglectful for my children because those in authority aren't up to speed with information such as the DSMV which says girls can have autism and epilepsy or that Muscular Dystrophy can be passed down through the generations. To live with the horror and fear of having my children ripped away from me into some unknown hell. It’s my reality and the reality of many others so I can have empathy for the children and parents. I am going on just the facts of families torn apart. Nothing more and nothing less.
I know my history, I don’t remember a lot of it but I know enough to know the shame of it. I was born too late to be alive during the big push to take Native American families apart. But I do know the fallout from it. I’ve heard from surviving Native Americans who were removed from their family and sent off to boarding schools. Forced to be with strangers both peers their own age and the employees. I know the stories of their treatment. I hear it in the group counseling sessions, I hear it in the community gatherings. I hear it at the meetings for getting programs to the children on the reservations. I hear it from the lack of response to children who are kidnapped on the reservations. I hear it from the elderly survivors in church. I hear the pain in their voice, I see their disconnect from not only their culture and society but also society as a whole.
I have heard the stories from a survivor of the concentration camp. I have heard the stories from the children and grandchildren of this survivor. The world was horrified by what happened in Germany. It was drilled into my head not to ever forget. As if I could with the nightmare-inducing tales I was told. But the ones who wanted me to swear not to forget where the men who fought in the war. Don’t let it happen again they said to me.
I know the horrors of being in a foster/group home situation and of being placed in an institutional prison type program simply because no one knew what to do with me and the lack of proper parenting I was getting from my parents at home. I didn’t belong there but there I was put. I was ripped from the family I loved and who had never treated me badly. I was ripped from the world I knew. I learned what fear, despair, and unknown means. I have nightmares from my past experiences still.
Because I know this and know it well I don’t want children put into any situation like this. These children may or may not fully grasp what is going on. They may or may not fully understand why they are coming here with mommy and/or daddy. But they sure are learning the horrors of an institutional setting that is outside of their typical cultural experience.
My crimes are my crimes, not my children. I don't want my children judged/punished for my crimes. My children sadly are on a regular basis but that's not the point here. The point is should children be locked in dog cages, or infants ripped from the breast of their mother while nursing. I don't think so.
Until we really know what is happening as to why these families are trying to get into this country I don't think we can judge if they are or aren't doing something wrong. I think there's more to it than that.
I mean take a look at Hawaii. If the people who are in Hawaii started fleeing here because of the volcanic action that started in May and doesn't show signs of stopping any time soon should we do this to them? I mean seriously how do we know they were there legally?
What about Puerta Rico? Look at the devastation they are still struggling with. They are part of the USA and yet they are being treated unfairly and inhumanely and they didn't do anything more than just got hit by a hurricane.
I'm not saying it's right or wrong to want to be in America. I fully admit that if my ancestors hadn’t wanted to come here I wouldn’t be here now. But I do think it's wrong to degrade and traumatize children for their elders' wanting to come here.
Now for the but Military and prisoners are separated from their children blah blah blah. In the case of the Military they know full well they will be separated and so do their families. They know it’s not a matter of if but a matter of when. I have military friends and family and have also been the little woman at home during deployments several times as my friends and family joke with me. The person enrolled in the military knows they will be sent to someplace outside their comfort zone for basic training and AIT. Unless they are incredibly lucky and live near the training camps. They know when it comes to deployments and even annual training for those in the guard or reserve units that separation happens.
Last I knew the families coming here aren’t military and didn’t sign up to be military so the separations are different. These people didn’t know it was happening. Heck, I didn’t know it was happening before now. So how can they know what they will be facing when they get here? These people are coming with hopes of staying intact and with the hope for a better life and the American Dream. In the cases of an unattended minor, someone probably sent them off with the hope of a better life and the American Dream. They knew separation was going to happen and had the pluck to come anyways. Still, these people don’t really seem to know what’s going to happen here and I don’t know if it would or wouldn’t be a deterrent. I just know they don’t deserve to be traumatized.
Now for prisoners. Yes, that does causes families to be separated. That does causes children to be ripped from their parents and a separation and breakdown in the family unit. But those children aren’t put in dog cages because mommy or daddy or the caregiver broke the law. The children aren’t punished for their parents crimes. Judged yes. Written off yes. But not punished with going to an institutional prison setting. They are put in the care of other family members or friends or even in to the system of foster care. And while the foster care system isn’t ideal it’s better than what’s happening to these families. And yes, I know there are horrible foster parents just like there are wonderful foster parents but that’s a totally separate issue. Still there is hope for reunification. Do these families have that? Most of these parents don’t know where or what is going on with the children. The children don’t know where or what is happening with the parents. Reunification isn’t even on the table. When a child’s parents go to prison, there are options for the child. People can discuss where the parent is, the child might be able to write to the parent or make a phone call or accept a phone call from the parent, there might be visitation. These children aren’t getting any of this. So in my humble opinion Military and Prisoners separations are nowhere close to what is going on with these families.
As for these families being unfit well you have to define unfit to me because unfit isn’t a one size fits all label. I know this from personal experience. I swear it’s on the flashing neon sign over my head. Yet every time it’s brought up and investigated I am found not to be unfit. For endangering their children by coming here? Maybe I don’t know for sure. But if that’s the case what about the families in Flint? Last I knew Flint Michigan still has unhealthy water. Should we be removing the children there and locking them in cages because their families can't provide clean water for them? No, we shouldn't. We shouldn't do it to anyone.
And why can we get away with it when if this happened in any other country there would be hell to pay.
Thank you for listening.